Come..~

~Come mi alma, me siento miserable.~*

A loose translation, done by my muther, for my original line:

Eat my soul, I'm wretched..~
-D.

Created today.~ new tracks

- Pivotal (Thing)

- French Song (Remix)

- Lord Adams

- Born in the A.D.D.

- Cacausionally



*** is/it's a Pivotal thing, it's a beautiful thing; a Feeling
(do you feel me?) (do you feel me?)


And it comes to ~ TIME, it's a Pivotal thing, it's a beautiful thing, and it's leaving
Time, is a beautiful thing, it's a Pivotal thing~


And it comes to Lust; it's a pitiful thing, it's a Pivotal thing
Lets me see you Lust; at the beautiful things,

Electro_Arise.*~

Over the past 24-hours, I have had some interesting ideas for an Electro move for myself; several song titles, and even schemes/ideas for a Debut album (maybe)~ We shall soon see.
Firstly and foremostly, I have been realizing that, nothing worth something cost nothing, and that being said, I need to walk out of my house at my next available time, and order a Korg keyboard, and some for of Technology & Equpt. to get my Electronica it's wings & flight~
I'm a *O*D*N G*D

- The Mariachi:

An electro-opera, where there is a Cover of some famous Mexican
Folk song, to a story (in dance) of a young man & girl, with the young man trying to prove his Love to her throw his passion, and song~


Track Listing:

- Lord Adams -(to be the name of my microSynth by Korg)

- God (Golden) *** Working Title only

- Elevators (Falling Down)

-Sill Motion

- 9-11, 1, 3 & 5

Only IF.~*~

If you can reject a person you love, you can reject anyone.

If you can think of killing someone you love, you can really kill anyone

If you can hate someone you love, love will be found in no one.

If you can give up something, or someone at will, you can give up anything.~

If you can hate your self, and take your own life, You really have no limits.~

~Water!~

It's rather strange but, ever time I drink water here at the office, I get this very strange FLOOD of natural scenes flwoing through my head; a field, a lake, a mountain side, a hike.~ I am whisked away by WATER!...




We all dream of our inner divinity; but it's not what you see, but how you can make other's see.~


We spend so much time following wisemen that we forget to be wise on our own.~

Who are you to say I'm wrong? You're not wrong, and I'm not "right", but we are bright, like burning stars; we've just scribbled out our light.~


I'd rather have a dime-store hooker than get hooked by you
Though she may give AIDS, I'm sure i'll suffer less
Then to be held close to your razor-blade chest.~

Bach. ~ #90 ~

Tonight my brother's Bachelor Party; should be interesting to see what happens.. I'm only hoping nothing too awkward happens,, on my part.~

Talked to Val this morning; it's looking like Christmas in Taiwan~~ it's basically a Seal'd deal~. Now I just need to do my Homework, find out prices (for flights), ask around with friends to make sure they'll be there, as well as possibly get some leads on possible Appartments for the Month, and ask Chris Tarpy if he can hook us up with some transport (a scooter or 2). Should be good, if planned properly. If you're there, be there! and if you not, Are you gonna be there?

Honour; reVisted..~ the 2nd comming

The Original post from July:.~*~


Honour all that is Lovely, and no other!~
Honour thyself and thy fiendish mother

Torture thyself to find pleasure
And when you've been found, you'll be their treasure.

Take heed, and walk blindly~ lest you wish to see the inevitable imperfection known as mankind.~


Strive for perfection~ be it in creating, or destruction..~


I feel your pain~~ each time I whip you, I pinch myself back...~~~

No one Ever FULLY agrees.~

No one ever Fully agrees with another person completely; for every single thing they think or do throughout their whole life.
This only proves we are just segrigaded Individuals, and thus being stated, who's to stand between you and anything really except a bunch of divided individuals.
The only one standing between your



People always say; "Oh well, in order to be worshipped, honoured, or esteemed Greater then one's fellows, you need People; every King needs his subjects"
This I must disagree with, due to the simple fact that, Without you to honour me, I would honour myself; without you to idolize me~ I would simply idolize myself.~
We all really need nothing more than a beating heart, and a pulsating mind.~

I say no more.

Over.~

As far as Mind over Matter is concerned, its really all the same. There is no strange Battle between them. If you're In-Love, when you are with the individual, you Feel the feelings; when you are absent, you Think of those feelings; your mind Re-creates them in your mental world, for you.~

In order to get over anything, you have to push in the opposite direction.
This explained, (for instance) if you want to get over junk food cravings, the more you eat it (in a row), the less you like it (hamburgers as a shining example..)

The best way to get Over something is to Dive into it; use and abuse it, and get so much that you can never STAND to see, feel, or hear (of) it ever again!

Be it man, woman, food, place, thing, drug, drink, smell, taste, look, or idea~
Abuse it, and it's lost its sacred divinity.~*~

Part II.

Architecture aside, the mornings fresh and clean outside.
We walk in stride, glancing at the piece of glass encased in gold & leather on our wrists, hoping our body has kept on beat; still up to date with the schedulized mind.**


And then at this intersecting road, filled by our immense collective flow [which at that moment, was collected into a sea of bodies] flows on each sides, branching either side. Each crowd has come to their stop; they are changing lines, and moving on towards each of their individual agenda.



Nothing should happen by accident; not it this present world of ours.
We know what works, and what does not.
Accidents do not happen; they're allowed.~ Either by negligence, or by some other inwardly motivated power.. for the disembertterment of another.~

Whats a word that means Darkening??


In our intersecting twilight
The rows of roof-tops, of houses neatly placed
In hats of grey, and garments beige
They lay

Dressed in our cool, ** blue
Arise, to a restful summer
On a beach; golden sands anew
and to roll over on warmness, to bake
In the sunrays at some strange layered night falls of daydreamers

I'll be damned if you'd greet me, alone
And if with smiles; never leave me alone
Cause I'm scared of the dark, in the day
And I'm freezing, with fire I play
Why is it in our solemn song
That we find all the answers to whats wrong.
I am mad to a pulp at my restraint
I cant believe just how helpless I'm shaped

If In the imagine of God I were made
Then to what pitiful being have I prayed?

I will not be accepting of my fate
I refuse to obey you beautiful king
Cause I feel that your crown should've been my ring
And all the jewels on your neck cannot equal my eyes
And your pure, polished gowns aren't as white
As the flesh that garnished my might.~

To give another what you have in bulk
Almost feel pompous, but still, has its ...

It's hilarious that through tension I find release
And the softest of angel is a Beast.
And I'd worship the Devil if you'd see
That by your reaction, you worship me.~

... If I were insane . ~*~

A Dream, within a Dream

I go to bed every night, In hope that I can awake in my other life in the city.~
close my eyes, gracious sleep; a door is all that lays before me
I am dress in my smooth, sharp divinity

I step out; before me lies the bulking majority of this thriving metropolitan collage
Of a vast multitude of faces; stand, and different each one, and yet~ strangely similar in basic cast.~
Into the vast movement, the crowded non-sense I step.

And in that pulse, so serene, everything flows at a set speed
You walk in the crowd without thinking, though you realize each step
Everyone is clad so clean; wearing crisp, fresh pressed clothes
The air seems softly garnished with rose;
We are stepping yet closer to our dreams


Just as there's a swarming crowd of black, blue, and tweed, towering monuments paint the morning sky with artificial blue clouds.~
The skies are still blue; all that is above a man's height retains that blue, like crystal clear water without the splash.
It's Sky-scrapes which line the streets on every side, almost like the overseeing guardians of the present age.
With their shiny, reflecting walls, they amplify the empty space, making the air above a land of it's own.~
To describe it all would be a rambling of eternity! There are no skies! It's an all blue, see-through; a land in the sky of perfect baby-blue.

We continue down the road, not thinking more of our next step, than we do for out next meal: 12:00pm sharp. Lunch time is arranged and set. Our lives seem arranged & set,,..
It's not some group of Hawks overlooking a town of rats and rodents; we're not encaged beasts within this town of splendour~ No; they're more like white marble slabs, as those engraved by the Greeks of old, as caretakers: The protectors & guardians of our own wall-street express.
And as we pass them by, we are almost giving them honour and gratitude by following their inlaid path of resistant black asphalt.
The sea of black, blue and tweed moves ever onward. No one ever looks up; no one ever notices the day to day surroundings. It's not because we do not agree with it's choice of garment this morning, but its more, that we see the world through the eyes of the adept. We don't need to waste our time anymore on whats been done; whats been laid down.~ We are saving our observatory powers for the unthinkable, and invisible.~



I'd feel you're pain...~

the Inception Conception.

I feel very Blessed, and even "Lucky" to have partaken, and been present for the Inception-age.~ We are living in the day of a dreamy awakening; we're awaking to our dreams, inside our dreams, and~ Taking back our reigns.

We are dreaming of dreams; unslaving, unveiling, and Prevailing within our ethereal reality; the Planet of our Own.

We have a reality within us, which we have long forgotten; unvail it you clogged up male-whore,, loose the mental oppression of the so names "Right & Wrong"!
Nothing is Evil or Good.~ There is .. a Marble slab of mixed shardes of shade~ We are a Collage of Observations.~ We are what we watch, what we see: what we eat, and what we wear.~ It's all an expressionism know is Society.~ Higher and Lower societys are just defined by how much Originality.. and how much implantation our minds are capable of relaying to the eyes of those around us.~

Being intune with one's self is portrayed by our own Display of ourselves.~ How we act, speak, dream, and see things are all calibrated by what we have been Told to compare it with.~

Forget all you know to Learn all just how much you DONT (know).~

Loose yourself to find your mind.~ (yes.~ I'm going to make a Trance song based off of this line.~)

Sign off~ -D.

Most Notable Quote of the Day.~*~

Friday August 13, 2010:



"As the impact happened, I'm thinking, 'I'm going to be dead,'"

"Then I realized that I was in so much pain, I couldn't possibly be dead."

- Ute Linhart, a fashion industry executive



{ excerps from a new post }

80th~: Friday the 13Th.

~.13.~

On the wings of my 13th Angel.~

Venus: ~ to an amazing mind.

There's a girl dressed in plain
pearly eyelids of pain
In her veins flows more energy then oil.~


And shes laying in a field
Of her mind's year-end yield
And she's bending the stare-gazing starlight

And on the ground; picnic pitch
By her hand's garnished stitch
Is the patterns of thoughts We've forgotten

Shes a young maiden-mind
Of her minds wealth of years
Though she fears what she hears in the real world

In her imaginative mind
She constructs scenes for the blind
Intertwined, like a laced Valhallan-wine.

Like a desert poppy flower
She is filled with potent Power
A presentation of sensation;
Always find her.~

She constructs what she wants
Doesn't wait, but creates
What she waits for.~

AirCons

The Theory of the Air-conditioner


I recently discovered an interesting theory playing on the big screen of my Brain the other day: Air-con's cause Cancer, and we have all been exposed to her putrid gamma-rays.~ We have all been exposed, and thus, will all dye a painful, drawnout, Pension-dispersing Death~ culminating in a massive accumilated Debit as your Hand-me-downs to your children & loved-ones to carry, like the Bricks-without-straw cubes which make up the Ancient pyramids~

We are frugil care-takers of our greatest (and most valuable) possession: Our Bodies (and lets just throw in a Combo side-order of The Mind.~)

one Fine morning.

Today I bought my first full Suit; a very nice suit I might add.~ It's not the traditional one I've always wanted; pin-stripe with a really Suave look to it~ a look of posh stuck-upness :]
But, I feel it's even better~ because It stands out, and in the words of my brother (whose opinion on matters of Fashion, looks, and presentation I greatly admire, and look up to) "that suit was made for you"~ We shall soon see.

No~ I didn't just go out on a spree-frenzy, buying a suit for the sake of buying a Suit,,~~ it was Deeper than that..~ A marriage.

Not mine, ohh no! My brother's; the same one I greatly admire..~ My only brother (though, at times, even he feels like a Half-brother; not because of Him or what he has done, said, or treated me, but simply cuz I'm a cunt, and a self-centred Independent prick, who strives off the fairy-tale fantasy that I am indeed an Orphan~)

Last night I went to bed early, as I had to wake up and be ready for the day before 9:30am.~ Yeah, that's probably not Early at allll in your minds, but for my regular schedule of 3:00-4:00am nighty-nights~ that is Off-schedule.~ :)
I set my alarm for 7:00am; refraining from some available drinks, Tylenol, or MDMA.

I woke up. on time, but still tired, I rolled over again back into happy-everland; rolled back over to the hour of 9:00, and got up, hoping I was quick enough on the draw to multi-task a Wake-up, breakfast, clothes-picking face-wash all withing the allotted half hour~ either that Or~ that Peter (my 2nd oldest brother) would be late.~

Fortunately, I was an able chap, and was ready to go at the time I got a Txt saying : I'm outside.

We drove off, heading down to Old South to pick up my 3rd brother, Steven, who we were all Praying would be ready..~ slow ass..

Once we picked him up, we shot back down the road (which was just a lye,,, we were slow as a constipated DUMP..~) towards International, the store where we were heading to purchase our suits.

We met up with Nester at his house (he jumped in, and we headed back out, heading closer towards White Oaks-area). While we were driving past, Nester said "You know, there was a Homicide out here last night; some chick got murdered". That's the first time I've heard "Homicide" used in a actual sentence out side of Law & Order.~

Uggh,, this is soo long..~~ I don't wanna tell the story anymore.. TBC~~

the Watery haven

There's something very Euphoric I hear, about drowning~
There's something to do with you letting the water fill your lungs; the weightlessness of your body.~ But what I think is, it's caused mostly by the Realization~ at the frightful, and last moments of Life~ you realize it's the only death that your not Alone~ your Surround, and supported by the very thing taking your life./~

its for me.~

Just a small disclaimer.~ I'm not here for fame, fortune, or even recognition.~
I dont need your praises, nor your sympathetic symphony/~ I'm really doing this all for me.~ I want to Know Myself, and this is how I can understand what I'm Thinking..~~ By Writing it up for myself to read over,, or simply Rescan as I type it out; materializing my Thoughts~ it's all just for a Material version of the Within.~

I'm not boasting,, I'm not Setting myself Above nor Beyond anyone else, but I could write my own Self Help books, and probably learn more than reading Yours or someone else's idea or concept which is not in the Wording that my Body & Mind can comprehend..~ Fully...

It's like reading a Poem you've created, vs. trying to comprehend [,, possibly] what the Author is trying to convey~?

Why,, simply.. WHy~
Fudge the fruitcake, and toss the Fettucini

August 88th.~*~

As of August 8th (or 9th depending on which side of the world you're on..), it has Officially been 10 years since I had my mind painfully expanded; shot out, and remolded out of the routine Rutt that all too many North Americans are still the slaves of.~

That was the day I moved to Asia,, when I saw a World beyond,, a world outside, and separate to some extent at least,, ~ A different Mentality~ A New World.

It wasn't as much of a Physical change,, though it was Humid as a crack-whore's ~...~
, it was more of a Mentality alteration~ A new way of seeing things, and acting accordingly.~

I have learned to see things differently; instead of being Wrong, Strange & new things are just Alternate ways of doing something.~
There is always a Alternative way of Seeing, doing, or Being something~ and really, there is no Definites, ~anything and everything can be done, and redone on an infinite level.~ And here I am.

Tylonol + Alcho = SLeeP

I just finally realized that consuming Any amount of alcohal + tylonol = Long deep sleep~
This, in the setting of a Work-day = total eminent disaster!! Like today.. waking up at 10:30, when my shift starts at 10:00! ..showing up half an hr late for my shift at work... fml~ sobb//

The worst thing is, I basically Already knew all this.. I knew what the Possible outcome was, But..
I didnt care enough to SToP~ AND NOW, I will suffer for my Sins in the bottomless pit of a hr-less Paycheck..~ BooM* (yes.. I just shot my brains out, Bye!)

a Talk of truth.~

Last night I talked to Lily Sakai,, and I vocalized my ideals, my goals, my ideas; my plans on life.~
I acknowledged my enjoyment in writing.. my want to make music.~
I wanna design, and start my Wicker-child clothing line~
I wanna write my movie script; Adept.~

I Wanna DO what my creations; the voices in my head.~ I wanna live the dream that is inside; inside my head, and LIVE IT, not just see it..~ as it flows on by,, like a loosely glad nymph in silky gown.~
I wanna Bone that Prom-queen.~ and HURT UU!! if u stand in my wayyy.~

-Dan * mL * Yes.. that's a L - finger-hand sign~

70th Post: . ~ and a Note from me

OMfGGG!!!!!!!!!!!~*~

Ok,, so I get to work, I set everything upp, open all my programs, browers, and wordpad, note pad, tracking sheets etc etc etc, and (being that I always show up at work before my shift's starting time) I still had time on my hands, I clicked on the web browser, and typed in: 20at12.blogspot.com~~
to find a strange message box: "This blog has been Deleted" ... I nearly Shatt myself..~

I was so pisssed,, I almost ripped off my 3rd testate.~ But no,, I thought of my unborn children~ and instead, logged onto Facebook, and pissed, moaned, and grunted at Alyx.~

Surfing the Ambient artistry.~+`>.~

While siting with the Bohemian in our dinning room, I heard a classical tune playing in the room next door; classical music, like the mood-music of an old 40's movie~ it was very pungent, and carried me off to a land of eloquence and sophistication; a world of the past age.
The lighting in the room, which was as dank as the vegetation we were smoking only aided the moody, and swaying Ballerina-like movements of a scene set in rhythm, dance and song, like all those countless balls which flooded the scenes of the rich and wonderful.~

Then back; back to the scene at present, like having a splash of water on the face, or a high pitched sound that wakes you from a pretty dream.

I was growing tired, yet~ interested in expanding my exploration on this strange and rather colourful visualization.~ I went upstairs, turned on my fan, and sat staring at my ceiling (which has wooden planks across, almost Tudor-style).~ I sat, and thought about turning on music, but I heard the rhythm of the fan, and the sounds of the air outside, and decided to just sit and absorb something beyond my regular intake.~
~ 818 ~
I laid down on my bed, and stared up at the white painted wooden ceiling..~ I started to trail, seeing a world outside of my regular, inspirational world. I saw the inspirations of painters, of fashion designers, and other Artsy peoples.~ I started to see things Outside the box~~ and through another Box,.~ Someone else eyes,, someone else's View.

I Then started to explore the possibilities of Constructing my own trip..~ My own Visuals in my head,, and forming my own Astral Projections..~ >~ ;)



I walked up
Your soul's of-age.~

DeathStar.~*L*~

Yesterday, I ran out of work at exactly 9:00pm, flew down the stairwell at broke-back, break-neck speed, and arrived JUST in time to catch the 13 Wellington as it was pulling away from the bus stop right outside my building on Piccadilly & Richmond St.
This was excellent, and I felt a rush of happiness (the RUsh may have been in part to me downing a 8 oz. cup of coffee with 2 minutes to 9:00..), but I was buzzing.~
I was buzzing, on my way to the Loblaws by Masonville to pick up some needed grocery essentials to my day-to-day lifestyle (the last on my list, though really, the Greastest reason for my trip was that of a small, fairly cheap-priced pencil which is really the secret ingredient to any successful lifestyle: Eyeliner!~)

I had actually gone an entire Week without (eyeliner..), and only after a day of which, did I fully understand the meaning of feeling Week in the Knees...~ I had a horrid week,,, both Physically, and emotionally~

Anywayz.. to make a long and drawn out half hour Short; I bought my stuff, ran through the store, even half checking out the Deals, as well as scanning the Icecream-section, before I headed out to the bus stop, with my newly purchased ... Eyeliner.~

I walked down my street, through the back parking lot thats along Oxford St.
It all seemed like a regular night and I tried to think of things on my "to do list' of possible Fun.~

When I stepped into my house, and walked towards the kitchen, there were people sitting around our dinningroom table; friends of Justine, one of my four room mates.
I walked over to the kitchen, past the people, nodding in greeting & awareness; politley, yet, minding my own business (like a good little boy should~). I unpacked my stuff, put it all way, and walked up stairs to put away my re-usable "green" cloth grocery bags (and to try on my eyeliner).
I can't remember exactly why, but I did head back down stairs for something (very likely, it was to check on a pot of rice I may have set to boil, before I headed upstairs).
I went back downstairs, and there was one dude sitting around, texting or doing something. I blerted out "hey, whats up?", which then led on to some brief small talk etc. I then went off to the kitchen again to get myself a drink, and then walked back and started talking again to the guy at the table.
It turns out he actually grew up in the Bahamahs, and moved to Canada for schooling (from the 8th grade up to University). He asked me if I smoked Weed, which I replied plainly: " Socially; I'm a social smoker, I'm not a dope head.~". He then started to tell me about the weed he had; stating he only uses the weed that "Blows your mind" and offered me a Toke of a strand he called DeathStar, which is actually a mix of 2 different strands; Sour Diesel and Sensi Star; which is only found in Iowa (or Ohio?) which means, It's rare as shitt!~ :)
he told me that most of his friend all have their Cards, which means they legally smoke Government Weed, which to anyone who knows anything at all, is some of the sickest stuff on earth..~ Not to mention, it's Legit., and it's Legal~!~
I then, out of simple curiosity, asked him what it Takes to get a Card; he said its fairly simply, and they even have the forms online. Basically, any body pain, or impairing condition (Stomache-aches, back pains, any pain,, basically..~)
I don't think I would ever go through the trouble, not matter how Easy it may be, though I would definately like to try some out some time (Government weed).~

The guy made a very good point; he said he never uses anything but Quality~ and that's a rather interesting mindset for life.~ Why waste time, money, effort, and enjoyment energy on going Half-way; doing things Half hearted, or going for the Cheaper pleasures of life.~ Quality over quantity; Though it may take longer, and cost more, It will feel better in the long run~ No matter what it may be.

It's the same with music; why waste money on a Cheaper instrument, which in the end, even if you are still learning, you will then move on and upgrade? Why waste the original amount of money, when that, plus maybe 1/3 more, will get you the latest of the greatest.~ It's like Mac's over PC; Epiphone over Gibson, Squire over Fender, NoName over Rayban~
Pay the price of that which lasts forever.~ and onward.

I learned a valuable lesson through that, looking back now~ I also learned something else.. which I will list seperately~ ... I lived a Lucid Dream, which could have very well been inspired by 2 things: Inception, and this girl I've spoken on this topic with~ stay tuned.
.. To Be Continued

Say no more: ~ A mental traveling

Hello~


I'm just sitting here, at work as per usual, and I Just started drifting through my imagination...~~

I think it was all brought on by a imaginary taste in my mouth; the taste of coconut & square pineapple cakes from Taiwan..
This made me think of the possibilities of going with Val's plan to go to Taiwan for the winter (Christmas to be exact..)
I started thinking of what would happen, the plans to be set, and just how much we could accomplish/do~

Just going to Taipei, and the Vast areas to see and do things at/in, not to mention, the whole visiting of the "shrines"... our dead memories of a age that feels almost ancient ..~

I started making imaginary plans; writing up a make-shift Blueprint:
-We should hit up Taichung; go to Chong Yo area, where all the hottest chicks and people go..~~
Go back to Hsin Ju, and Shanshan; hit up The Old House in Shanshan.. the home away from home..~ The place where we enacted our own terrorism's, screwed around, drank, smoked, plotted, and planned our own Goals and achievements for our futures..~
To revisit Wu Ling Lu,, to see The Window,., and the roof where we committed crimes against our fellow man.~

It wouldn't be expensive to travel around, and that being one of the biggest benefits of Taiwan; Price really isn't that big of an issue once inside..~

This little thought-traveling session also made me realize something. As I sat here, and thought to myself: DON'T SPOIL IT BY THINKING TOO MUCH... I also realized.. By Thinking it, I have already done it (at least Halfway..~)
It made me realize~ We can really Re-visit the entire globe according to what we can recall~ and at really no price at all, except time (which when put in it's proper perspective) can be spread a lot thinner when used properly (for instance, everything [and more..] of what I just wrote here, plus all the Details and scenes of which, all played through my mind in the time frame of less than 5 minutes.~ I revisited memories, feelings, 4 cities, and relived a scene that Never even existed before, which means.~ I created a Life of imaginary substance~ Like a movie made out of clay,, only to be squished, and again, readily available to be molded into another..~) Say no more evil..~

to a Friend.~

The other day I was told "You're one in a million" by a friend; a good chap, and an excellent conversationalist & friend.
I cant say we lived together long, only a couple months; that brief period of time felt a lot longer in retrospect.

Between the countless discussions on everything from day-to-day topics, to movies, to the make up of the universe, we could discuss and see this prospectively, not necessarily "correctly" or how the usual thought pattern evokes.

I don't know if he will ever read this, but it doesn't really matter because I simply wanted to document the past, so I can move on to that fabric called future.~

a Memory.

Hmm~~ Today, while looking through some pics that a friend posted from an event that happened where I used to live, I was filled with a somewhat sadness; a bit of a Disappointment,,~~ That I had missed out on Good Times..~

This is not something New, or the first time I've felt it~ But it always bears the same suffocating pressure on my lungs, like the whole universe was crushing down on my chest.~ It was was borderline intoxicating.

I just had this realization of sorts, though I wasn't "realizing" anything new.~ Time does go by "faster or slower", you just absorb more Enjoyment in that time period which seems to have Flown by~
For instance, just 4 minutes ago, I realized it has been an hour since I went on break, but it literally feels like I looked up from the clock, to look back down and read an hour later.~

To touch back on what was mentioned earlier, I've started to Remiss the past (particularly the people & places which had brought out those happy memories), and now this is becoming painful; like a Christmas memory before a great tragedy... the last time you saw that loved-one before they fell through the thin ice, to their sombre, watery Grave..~

Memories kill.~

Ommggg~!~

OmgomgOmgg!!~ I just found the sickest buzzz from coffee: ~ Coffee + Maple syrup = KiLLer BuZz

August 2nd.~

August 2nd; a day of second chances maybe? Who knows. All I know is: I'm Alive.~ And supposedly, that counts for something.

That song that goes "let's pretend that it's '98" is kind of depressing..~ Why would I need to look back on someone else's Struggle to "greatness"; its a marketing scheme to make us feel like we're part of their lives, when really~ Who knows if its even true. Who's to know if that's even how the story went, or how their life was..~~ That's the best (or worst) part about an autobiography.~~ You get to retell the story in whichever manor you best see fit.~

I hear a lot of songs recently that are slapped together musically, and just drone on the concept of wanting to be "A billionaire; so freakin bad!". If you did really want to be, then you would be working as hard as you can to make it; make it to the top, or just "make it" in general.~
If you want something, there really should be nothing to ever get in your way; either physical, or metaphysical..~

Nothing is impossible ~ just the thought of it being so.~

Subway Station.

Sky of blue, and clouds of white.~ What a view outside my window here at work. Again, I'm sipping on Coffee, and feeling her soft buzz tingling in my body..~

Subway.~ I just walk over to subway; got a Ham-footlong, on toasted 9-grain.
Im usually lazy when it comes to details such as "topings", so I usually (simply) say "Everything~",, it saves me time, and effort.~
"What sause would you like?", "umm,, I think I'll go with Honey mustard, mayonnese, and sub-sauce" (again, mostly out of laziness~ my sandwich then somewhat resembling the age-old stereotype: Boys wear blue, Girls wear pink rubbish..~)
I don't care, it tasted alright (although, when your sub does contain "everything" toping-wise, there's usually a fair bit of fall-out going on..~~). But one thing i find a total Ugggh! about subway is that they DONT cut through the freakin paper when they cut the sub into halves. They cut the sandwich, then wrap it in a one-piece paper, which makes it such a hastle to take a half on your leasure.. ~~ Siigh..~~ just another Direction i'll have to throw out there.~

But no, Subway is still pretty decent~ they do a good job, I must say~ for the most part.